August 13, 2018

Today was the first day of school. It was awful.

I go to Foothill High School, a competitive High School in California. As you pass through the hallways, you can hear people gossiping about homework, test answers, and teachers. The environment is so competitive, that school becomes a student’s life.

At school, I tried explaining my story to one of my trusted classmates today and all they said was “That’d make a great college essay!”

One of the things my transplant education didn’t warn me was that after transplant I had a new perspective on life. I can’t look at my classmates, my school, or my life the same way as before. I realize, unless they went through the same thing I did, they won’t emphasize with me.

I think I can compare this to military veterans. I am not saying that I’m the same or better than a military veteran, just that we can be similar in an aspect. After a veteran from the military is discharged, they can’t view life the same way as before. They’ve seen too much war, too much sadness in life and cruelty in humanity to adjust back into society.

Personally, being in the Ronald McDonald house and constantly being around sick people made me realize the unfairness in life. I don’t know how to adjust from a hospital setting back into a normal setting. Do I try to shove this new perspective away, or continue to acknowledge it?

As I passed from class to class, I realized I couldn’t relate with my classmates anymore. When asked “What did you do over the summer?” I just said “Stayed at home.” I knew that if I said “at the hospital” it would just make them uncomfortable.

Transitioning back to normal life is hard, but all I need is a group of people that’ll understand me. My comfort will be there.